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In an enjoyable time, I shall only fully blooms gaze into the future, anxious and helpless.
distance is again the key word. Again is the wrong word, nor always puts it better. The more I try to reintegrate new is always more to me, as far as I'm already removed. If I do nothing, to lose this as well.
If I see it in my world, I see only one or collenchyma Sklerenchymgewebe. Dead Empty cells which express a distinct vacuum in the whole. Away from the cambium and the shoot itself entwickelden. The protoplast has already begun ages ago to downsize, for years he has disappeared. Through my lignification seems to want all my shell again. How cysts of Nematoda in a liver. Plow through living tissue. Yesterday in matrix
know I've learned an interesting comparison, but biologically incorrect but very interesting. For a virus to its nature can continued, he must attack and force them to Wirtoragnismen denatution which is gleichbedeutet with its propagation. Like a plague, he falls from one place to another Place and must find new victims. Not independently able to reproduce. Similarly, the man, he is exploiting a place until all natural resources are depleted, affecting the next place. Own life, he could not.
Did I not always done? Moved from place to place? I called and won the war and so start again with a new epoch. If I see now in my Icq, I see many people I do not even know who they are. See people who stood by me even closer than my parents and are now only appears as the name. See, even old ones, even my relationship with Inet. Silent names in a redundant list. All distances, inaccessible in the distance. I get cold again, especially when I think if I would lose everything and veroren. Mathematicians have caste is expected in 4 months at Aachen, it is even more than me. Hamburg still hovers in the air. Not only by distancing in local sense but also by dissociation in the mental sense, I am now far from many as I ever was. Even though I give my best, the people in Bonn bother me somehow, I have forgotten how to get along with people who are different. In Peridon I was substituted, so many new faces on the already integrated more deeply than I ever was. I was most hurt but that here in Hennef, people who are most important to me degree, sometimes even just have just a handful of people left with whom I still get along really well so as then. I love to swim, it gives me at least a brief moment the illusion of the past.

It was long time ago
a moment full of laughter
but every day more and more of this hilarity
was very difficult to find
Too late I noticed what I read back
it was my paradise
Far away from all the luck
there is now no Back
terror gathered when I realized that I'm damn
in the cold.
The only thing I can rid
My memories, which is breaking through the cold for a short time

Vll it randomly, vll it is simply the time it me or am I just an also vll. But I think soon I will soon go back in there to where I came from, in the solitude. The lone wolf without pack Alpha, useless in the dark. Natsha is the only light I have left, what gives me solace in my darkness.